I acted like I was still sleeping as she gathered her stuff to leave.. that's when she let one rip
Apparently I signed "I love you" on my bar tab last night.
Just tipped at a bar in cheerios. Suck it.
Next time i try to unbutton my R.A's shirt with my teeth, please stop me
No promises.
Hey man your outta milk
How the hell do you keep getting in my apartment?!
update. expensive tequila only makes the mistakes more expensive.
I found a bag of weed while packing. Now packing is like creating tiny universes inside of boxes.
Even worse we were making a sex tape so our reaction to the condom breaking was recorded.
You showed them your nipple for dollars for the jukebox. You were depressed because only one of your songs played. Oh then you twisted your ankle and blamed it on your mad stripper skills.
No shame in my game.
we left when one of the guys tried to stick himself with an IV that he found
can we just punch him in the dick and call it a victory for feminism
I feel as if I need Plan B just being in the same room as them for more than 5 minutes.
How awkward is it to have the guy you used to sleep with congratulate you on your engagement? I'll tell you. Very.
I just volunteered myself to get tazed this should get interesting
I’ve slept with a Senior, a Freshman and a Junior so far. I’m a Sophomore away from hitting for the cycle
Randomize