More tranny stories later!
Laying in bed naked with the guy I just fucked, talking to his WIFE who's sitting across from us like we're having a fucking tea party. This is interesting.
I accidentally told him I've been cheating on him with his brother last night.
How did that happen by accident?
I was drunk and vomited all over him and thought, "maybe he will just stay with me out of pity if I tell him with stomach acid and alcohol all over his crotch." I was wrong.
I just passed on expense account drinking, this must be the worst hangover ever.
i just declared my major based on how close the department building was to our apartment. laziness has been brought to a new level
He drew a bath for me. It was only cute until he started throwing in celery and calling me soup.
I feel like this is the moment of high where you have to write these texts down to remember to text them and feel that somehow this is important to the continuity of the world.
I tried to talk to him, but he didn't recognize me at first. I had to show him the top of my head and then he remembered.
WHY IS IT FROWNED UPON THE DRESS UP IN CAT COSTUMES AND SIT OUTSIDE OF BARS WITH A BOX OF WINE I THOUGHT THIS WAS AMERICA
The amount of knuckle children I've had to the Farrah Abraham sex tape is disturbing and impressive
I just bought spray paint, a T-shirt, and a box of magnum condoms. The cashier refused to make eye contact! Haha
Dude I'm drinking alone and watching cartoons. How is it that someone as hot as me is doing this.
What can I say, like your penis. The fact that I like the person attached to it helps too
Dude, my back STILL hurts from carrying the team on BP last night.
tell me about the fingering
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