I know its small, but please -- stop calling it my "weenis".
The best part about the NBA starting up is I get to see Charles Barkley make a fool out of himself for 8 months
On a scale of "impaired judgement" to "Mel Gibson," how drunk are you?
Toaster
I'm back here naked if anyones wondering
next time we make out at a concert please try to refrain from screaming out our hotel room number.. the amount of guys that knocked on our door after you passed out was ridiculous
Should I be scared that after we hooked up she took antibiotics with Sailor Jerry's?!
I have one goal now that I am in the USA. To find a man I can fuck into marriage before my visa runs out.
Did you smoke and go to the aquarium again?
It started getting weird when you decided to scold my vagina.
It was probably bad to sleep with someone just to pet his dog right?
Yeah. We're taking this fuck buddy relationship to the next level. Sober weekday sex.
I’m mid 4sum and you’re sending me photos of your cat. We had very different evenings.
What's a sexy way to say balls deep???
So the same great-aunt that told me to freeze my eggs for procreation just told me that I should strut around the dance floor b/c I'd get picked up.
I need to meet your family.
i'm not sure you can trust me in a car with 20 dozen donuts
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