I think scott just propositioned me for sex
everytime he calls himself the maxipad master i can't help but wonder what costume that would involve.
your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
there is just no excuse for touching your mothers vagina.
It was so good the neighbors even had a cigarette.
I miss waking up, opening the closet downstairs, and finding you inside passed out.
Okay, we really need to start training for the St Pattys parade. 48 hours of green beer won't end well if we don't prep ourselves. 2 week bender starts now
Just sucked my third dick in the past twelve hours. I must want AIDS.
It's great when the cashier at the liquor store asks "weren't you wearing those clothes yesterday"
He fucked me so hard I might have to go to the hospital for internal bleeding
Can I have him when you're done?
someone to text and fuck? since when does that constitute a relationship?
since 2006
Remember those girls from the bar? The tall and short blondes?
Is this a story I am going to hate you for?
I say we start a new tradition. I came up with it all by myself. It's called work out, lay out, black out
Fucking holidays. How do I have this many men who want to fuck me and none of them are available when I'm ready to blow my top?
Omg. I definitely just got hit on by my doctor AFTER he completed my pap smear which clearly showed I was in the middle of an outbreak. What. The. Fuck.
Randomize
