Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
3.50 mugs at the bar.
Nah man, im with an ugly chick. Im waiting til everyone's drunk enough tonight, they don't notice.
How ugly, and does she have friends?
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
there needs to be a "man fax report". like car fax. type in the guys name and bday and up pops all the bad shit he's ever done.
And then he said "my dick isn't hard enough and your tits aren't big enough for this to work"
you know that saying beer then liquer makes you sicker, it should be beer then pickles makes you throw up alot, everywhere.
When you're on the hood of a car, 10 mph feels pretty fucking fast.
I just saved him in my contacts as "Has 2 kids.. don't drunk text"
She hash tagged the word blow job in her text. Tonight's going to be good.
All I I know is that there's 2 new contacts in my phone. Drunk Backdoor and Gayass Handshake. Thanks, Jameson.
Would you be offended if I asked you to smoke a blunt with me while I pooped?
Some guy walked in while I was taking a piss and asked me if I knew of a back way out of the bar. He looked pretty freaked out.
There is booty call etiquette, and he just isn't following it. I'm not making you breakfast, gtfo.
Dude, you can't even imagine the trip, I actually thought that there were Care Bears sitting next to me at the bar, I'm pretty sure I started hitting on the pink one.
She's 90% sass and 10% boobs
Randomize