I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
YOU GOT EVICTED FROM A TRAILER PARK!?!? WTF!!!!!
he offered to walk down from the bar this morning to my house and bring me a guinness...
how romantic. its the irish mans version of flowers
Nicee. Atleast your phone doesn't change pen in to PENISsSSSSSSS like mine does
Note for the future: whiskey syrup is AMAZING on 3am pancakes.
She kept talking about how amazing the banana she had yesterday was. Don't know if it was innuendo, stoned, or just a really amazing banana.
Apparently getting dressed is an all-day activity.
I swear I can't go out anymore. It's like he put a GPS in my dick. I don't know if I should feel awkward or proud...
I'm sitting on the floor singing Bruno mars while they cook and occasionally pet me
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
Just introduced myself to a group of people and one dude said "You're Marc!? I've heard many a legend of you." I raised bottle of champagne, said cheers, and drank with them.
You kept insisting you found queso that's better than oral sex
One of the guys just came in and goes "i walked all the way home with a pumpkin". Night just got better.
So the same great-aunt that told me to freeze my eggs for procreation just told me that I should strut around the dance floor b/c I'd get picked up.
I need to meet your family.
Finally got with the virgin.
Yeah? Howd that go?
As soon as I got it all the way in, I looked deep into her eyes and said "your soul is mine" in the deepest voice I could make. She was not amused.
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