Wait. When you mean sick you mean a cold sick right ? not something else.
1. No more tequila 2. Why do you let me say slutty things? 3. I woke up and our apartment was covered in cake? 4. Love you
you kept slapshing your drinks on people saying the power of christ compels you.
She had a maple leaf tattoo behind her ear and told me she liked my "playoff beard".
Only in Canada would your laziness be applied to hockey and rewarded.
just saw a former disney star do a keg stand. her life choices have improved.
Funny. I made out with his brother for the first time in a bathroom too.
and lets be real... who can blow a middle school class's sunday school teacher and keep a straight face ever again? NOBODY.
Katelyn drunkenly ripped the soap dispenser off the wall so we decided to call it quits
Just saw a midget on an elliptical. Epic.
Great news I took pics last night
Warning: most of them are of you peeing while I take selfies
Dear awkwardly drunk roommate, thanks for stuffing enough change in my clevage that I could afford a pepsi at work today. Sincerely awesome roommate that put up with your drunk ass
You remember the guy they called Meat in high school? Well, let's just say my vagina remembers him now.
I mean I love some drunk compliments, but he just wasn't up to my low standards.
I feel like my vagina was just in a fistfight.
I've never met a penis that didn't think I was awesome.
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