I'm almost 25, which means I can ride with girls that have permits
you definitely have a few illegitimate kids
probs. Not too worried about it though. MOst girls are too embarrassed that they let me into their pants that they'll never admit its mine
If he doesn't notice me by the next party, i'm just gonna go up to him and pll his pants down and blow him.
Sounds like a plan.
I just foul balled at work. I had taken off my coat too… had to go to the sink wash my hands then go back to the stall and pick up my coat. I hope the guy shitting in the stall next to me didn’t figure out what happened.
I just smelled my beer. It smells like coming home.
in hindsight, $10 Malibu buckets were a terrible idea...
i finally watched harry potter... a tad unrealistic if you ask me... i mean a ginger kid with 2 friends?
All I know is he mentioned whips, leather cuffs, and a riding crop. It's like Halloween, Christmas, and My birthday all in one. a 5 year old couldn't even possibly be this excited.
doing laundry. just found my fishnets from Friday. the ENTIRE crotch is torn out. guess that answers the "did we have sex in the cab" question.....
Can we have a celebratory fuck now that the lockout is over?
You're the best girlfriend ever.
Meh. People are people bro. All of us are hairless psychotic apes. Happy 420.
You both snapchatted me that. Like, I just got a double dose of penis pastry.
It's a herpes check up not a beauty pageant
I just want him to make us coffee. And whack off into the sunset
I just puked on a sprinkler…Motherfucker tried to spray me
Randomize