Soo i just shotgunned a water balloon...
Forget about socially acceptable. Make me happy instead
dude..why do i always have to pick up the kitty litter after you drink?
If I've learned one thing today? Blow jobs get you to state championships.
Alright. Who did it? Who's bangin' the ump?
WTF YOU HAVE A GIRLFRIEND?
Oh yeah that.
and then you went into taco bell without pants...and surprisingly you weren't the only one there without pants
She gave me a foot massage with her tongue. I think we're both scarred for life.
Please tell me how I go from a guy with a coke problem to a cop. My own life doesn't even make sense to me anymore
You haven't lived until you've watched a retriever try to bring back the condom you just threw in its master's garbage
It's like some sort of initiation to finger one of them... so I did it. And got high fived afterwards like a dozen times.
Those were right hand only?
YOU KNOW BRAZILIAN BOYS ARE MY WEAKNESS
Munching saltines, sippin Gatorade, and trying not to get eaten by this small horse
we got cupcakes after we fucked. gives a whole new meaning to sugar daddy
im looking at the positives. number one it stopped me from hooking up with vince infront of his girl, number two it gave me something to do instead of throwing up and number three i fuckin rocked his world
I’m making a jello mold of my penis
Will it be as disappointing as your actual penis?
Randomize
