There are 3 speedbumps now up. Think you can manage the urge to piss on them?
Aw shit! That's like putting me a in a room full of Captiain Crunch Donuts and Jasper Hale and not letting me put my mouth on either.
The night began with "let go home early so we can study for my 9am final" and ended with "show me your boobs for a free pack of gum".My breasts are worth 14 sticks for a dollar.
I had a talk with my mom about respecting myself and not acting like a whore so she will rip my nose ring out if she somehow sees that picture
She refers to my dick as princess Sarah... oddly I'm okay with that.
They had an entire room dedicated to passed out people. It was like a dogpile of cross faded toddlers drooling on each other.
Dude she has the ugliest blow job face ever.
Do you know who the random guy who just walked in to kiss me goodnight is?
In reality u ask do u have beer at your house but what your really saying is will there be cock in my mouth
She wanted to to do it on top of a horse, I can't compete with that
I think my uterus is still laying in your bed somewhere under the covers.
Well. Turns up no one actually knows who that kid was. Came in, said happy fathers day, chilled for a while, then left.
I think I need to expose myself to your dog so he knows that I am also a male.
Leave it to me to sleep w a guy who gets poison ivy on his dick
Do I get bonus points if I get lockjaw after a cosmic blowjob?
Dude. Woke up this morning wearing that chick's panties. 8/10, would recommend. I love tequila.
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