How'd it feel making her break her religion?
I cant remeber how long i've been laying here...it could be 10 minutes to a fucking day
he couldn't find his key, so we just had sex on his parent's porch while we waited for his mom to get home.
She posts like 3 statuses a day pleading for pity. Responding positively would be like giving a dog a treat for shitting on the floor.
You convinced us both to take shots of jack Daniels through our eyes.
Soo time for a life change, my 6 yr old sister made my gf a puke bucket for her birthday
Man, I must say, having known you since preschool, Eiffel-Tower-ing her would've fully completed our journey to brotherhood.
Ok if you are accepting my apology, please continue to ignore me. If you are not, please fill out the brief survey that follows, to help me improve my people relations: a) your a bitch please leave me alone b)your crazy pls leave me alone c) I never cared ab u please leave me alone. D) all of the above e) all of the above but I wouldn't mind still fucking u. F) who are you again? Your answer will not b shared and will b used in accord. With the law. TY
He was supposed to visit me tonight but he decided to stop in Tacoma so now I'm sitting on my bed naked eating oranges and candy corn while I watch Parks and Rec.
Now I have to hook up with him tomorrow DURING THE DAY.
Then that is decided. Fuck away my little bunny rabbit.
I sent him a cookie cake that said "Congratulations you're not a father"
I fucked him on my yoga mat. Then we wake and baked and ate granola. So yes, you could say I found my center.
She was way too drunk so I dropped her off at her house and smoked a huge blunt with her mom.
Just got done being naked and Mooning the cops. I'm still alive. Let's drink.
I was left to my own devices with nothing to do but drink
Randomize
