dinner at cheesecake factory: $40. drinks at yard house: $50. having sex in the VG parking lot while people are staring at you awkwardly: priceless. Goodnight.
i wish starbucks made bloody marys
Just printed out my Plan B coupon at the library. Saving my own printer ink and paper as well as 10 dollars towards not being knocked up.
I'm stoned and have been watching so many cartoons that I changed the channel and real people were on, and it scared me
at which point I apparently ran in and shouted "I made the sex with that one!"
you flashed my boyfriend last night so i tackled you to the floor. you may be a bit sore.
Today's work quote "if I looked like you, I'd be sitting on everyones face"
I complimented him on his choice of carpeting while he was humping me.
Have 7 min to kill while I wait for liquor store to open. Feels really awkward.
Night one million where I have madri gra beads around my neck and no justifiable reason for where they came from
With great liquor, comes great irresponsibility. Remind me of this night tomorrow.
We only initially bonded over boobs and sarcasm
Oh BTW the next time I see you I don't care where we are your dick will be going into some part of my body.
Unless you want to see me masturbate, I think skype is a no go for now.
LOOK AT HOW SMOOTH THIS BITCH IS
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