: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
This Casey James character from American Idol is really gonna mess up my sex life.
Or maybe the fact that you know who Casey James is will be what messes up your sex life.
I was blowdrying my hair this morning and I swear to god it smelled like franzia
It's like there testing me. My dad kept handing me margaritas and saying "you can take it"
i love that you felt the need to clarify that you don't actually have drugs in your vagina.
on the way to the hospital you kept asking if we could stop at the bar first. then you proceeded to puke out the window
just did a beer bong in the shower while i was taking an actual shower its officially football time
I'm so hungover I literally am considering drinking from the fishtank to avoid getting out of bed.
I fell asleep on the bus and woke up in Italian Las Vegas. Europe was a successful continent for me.
No offense, I mean I'm sure you rocked my world and all but I don't remember.
As I was balls deep, she moaned "i can't wait to see what how hot our daughter will be". Instant de-boner
fuck you I'm eating salad I can't be drunk.
Something must have happened, they started yelling truffle butter and you said we needed to leave NOW
I see the guy who's been trying to get me to let him eat my ass became engaged on Facebook today; would framed screen shots be an appropriate wedding present?
Apparently my hair turned out really good because I got my butthole licked by a stranger last night
Randomize
