I am at The Loft in SoNo, and there are two girls within arms reach that are making out with each other AGGRESIVELY. Like I can see 100% of a boob
For future reference, this is Trevors little sisters phone now. Trevs number is 484 XXX XXXX. Great story tho
I'm glad you talked me out of that flying penis tattoo.
just got 3 freshman girls to makeout with each other at a toga party! score!
why is this not a picture message?!?!
dude, I'm listening to "I believe I can fly", i'm high, and driving. this is so amazing.
...and the foreplay consisted of me threatening to cut off his hand if he didn't remove it from my back.
He stood up, threw the bag of bud between me and Tory, yelled "Fight" and then ran upstairs for the pizza
I just really need to get the matching flask to go with my pill box. Is this another step towards rock bottom?
We were just at different life stages. He wanted to get married and have kids, I wanted to take MDMA and fuck my roommate.
Are we talking about who knows if I'll get naked pictures of you with a broadsword or who knows if I'll be surprised?
If I have to masturbate more than twice a week you fail as a fuck buddy. Just so you know...................you failed
This is classic penis vs brain.
you told me your favorite colors were "pink" "no pants" and "Mexican food"
Yeah, I mean I'll probably fuck him regardless but I'm trying to be a lady about it.
Please tell me im imagining that i claimed that i was king of the ducks.
I woke up to rachel asking "did anyone else fall out of a tree last night?"
Randomize
