I just went through her cupboards. Eye patch and sword. nowhere near each other. different shelfs.
I just puked in an auto zone parking lot. I'm never eating peanut butter and red wine for dinner again.
i've never seen someone fall down the steps so gracefully... i think im in love
I can't believe all I ate yesterday was half a turkey sandwich and 20 finger licks of exctasy.
I don't remember anything other than how good it felt when I peed my pants.
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
woke up this morning in the hall outside of my parents room with a sign taped to myself that said "im sorry"...
This is probably the only time in my life I'm going to be able to say I'm going to the hospital too smoke weed and play Mario kart.
I need to puke. I need a shower. I need rehab. I need to detox and puke. I feel like demons are inside of me.
Are you awake? Because I would like to know whether or not I should refrain from giving my evil laugh when I enter the apartment...
your life is not complete until you watch a gaggle of murderous clowns dance to gangnam style.
also, what is the correct term for a shit ton of clowns?
dont know how to tell my grandparents I woke up in a frat house in the wrong town and that's why I can't see them today
I'm bleeding and have questions
Oh my fucking god!! There is a barefoot white guy with a fucking ninja sword in the middle of the street next to the pride gas station swinging his sword at peoples cars!! He almost got me. 3 people swerved off the road and stopped. I told a cop.
I feel asleep with my contacts in, with my arms wrapped around a bottle of vodka. Also... Do we have class today?
Randomize
