yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
im pretty sure i just saw someone trying to catch a fish with his penis
john hughes is dead. crushing any and all dreams of me ever being in an 80's john hughes film. bummer.
this is a reminder to untag myself in the picture of me flashing the photographer in the morning.
just letting you know that jen either: wasn't feeling well and ate grass to make herself throw up or threw up because she's stupid and ate grass
Another Sunday, another 100 chicken nuggets
I'm being fed tequila grapes by a girl on stilts...
Can we agree to not tell mom about this?
This isnt even the most disappointing thing i know about you.
Just talked to Laura, confirming that is my bra. Hope it goes well with the rest of your wall decorations.
My mom was looking at curtains for me and sent pictures and I had to be like "not the Disney princess pink and purple, more like an acid trip"
I've seen people win free drinks for a lot less dude, no need to drop trou on a piano.
Just for the record, you referenced Harry Potter while complaining about being torn between the Slytherin (lesbians) and Gryffindor (your mostly straight friends) houses (tables)
We're making a scrapbook of dick pics, you want in or what?
I think I'm pregnant again.
or as we call it, thursday.
Swear to god, somebody just drove by with mickey mouse in their passenger seat and he waved at me.
Randomize
