sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
Words of wisdom-never eat a peanut-butter covered banana on a construction site ever again
if you don't let us come over today i'm not taking the second plan b pill. your call.
he was CRYING into my vagina
This whole situation could've been avoided if you would've just let me open the beer
I just had someone I don't even know on Facebook message me saying it seems like I drink too much and should slow down.
There is a car windscreen wiper in my handbag... Not my car's, not ok.
I'm sending midget strippers dressed as bull fighters with mini bottles of 1800 to your house. Already made the call. Jer is going halves on it. Can't be stopped! Won't be stopped!
I was drunk and really grossed out when you poured cheese on me and, I guess I just freaked out.
After getting kicked out of the bar, you proceeded to McDonald's, ordered 30 nuggets, slammed them all back in 5 minutes and then stole 3 traffic cones...how you only got charged with drunk in public is beyond me.
I promise that I won't shotgun beers with your boyfriend this time, Scouts Honor.
We had sex last night...... This "Friends" thing is going well.
Thank you for stroking my rage monster tonight.
Drunk you wants to be petty, not you you.
hurry there's a jack Daniels slip n slide and clothes are coming off faster than I can even comprehend oh thank god for autocorrect
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