YOURE GIVING A BLOW JOB TO THE BOY WHO SAYS "OH SNAP"
Just walked pass a bum on the way to a coinstar... awkward
I'm at the laundry mat. This guy is here showing me his ankle monitor. The weird ones always find me.
just woke up to overhearing her on the phone saying "yeah we fucked last night, that makes 42." should i get tested?
well i fucked her too, so yes.
I'm hoping he'll tell everyone how great in bed I am. Well, how great in bathroom floor I am.
I want to hump her dimples until her face caves in.
So many issues. You honestly need help.
she gave me head while wearing a sombrero and told me it was her "welcome to south of the border" blowjob. i am never leaving mexico.
in the middle of fucking he asked me if i had gotten a haircut because he noticed i didnt have split ends anymore. i dont know what to think
You started throwing frozen shot glasses at people and you kept saying "it's fine, they melt."
I think I'm getting sponsored by the Mexican Drug Cartel for the start of my poker career. It was an interesting night at the bar. One word, Vegas.
Being able to fart in my own house is like 90% of why I pay rent
He took some pill and now he's on all fours demanding we give him chips from the dog bowl. Come get him.
I'm super disappointed in my clit.
I have a video on my phone of someone streaking in my house last night, do you have any idea who it is?
The guy next to me on the bus has one hole in his jeans that has over 20 mini dicks drawn on his leg. Classic.
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