Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
i found a roscoes card in my pocket that says 'fuck me bare fo $15.20'. Wow
My dad is complaining about how his computer keeps getting viruses. I don't have the heart to tell him he needs to stop downloading so much porn.
While in Europe, he bought me a pouring tap to put on my liquor so I don't spill. This means 2 things.1) He really loves me. 2) I'm a noticeable alcoholic.
The prescription for my birth control just blew away in the wind on my way back from the health center. It's like god wants me to get pregnant
Just caught my first cougar this fake was worth every fucking penny.
He broke into my apartment to check his Facebook again, the beer is all gone, and there's a new high score on pac man.
I'm trying to find candidates for my winter break hook up. I'm going to hold auditions thanksgiving break.
Also.. The Hobbit does not look like a cartoon. We were just too fucking high.
btw my ex came by last night and saw the pregnancy test intructions. awkwarrrrd.......
it's too much effort for something that isn't food.
It's 1am and I'm on LSD and I have diarrhea in a Dunkin Donuts. Help me
A legendary roster of degenerates has been assembled.
The wine is franzia the food is cheese puffs there is a canoe full of beer and the andre glasses are mason jars glued to candle sticks. i shit you not. Best. Wedding. Ever.
I mean, he’s listed as “Andrew DC Threesome” in my phone. THATS HOW I REMEMBER HIM! How is that not the start of a fairytale?
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