I woke up this morning and the first thing i saw was the harry potter tattoo on his left butt cheek.
i wish there was an iPhone app that lets you write a TeXt LiKe tHiS
dude...come out of the closet already
She cried. My mom screams. And nut went everywhere. It was all around a bad situation.
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE GAY FRIEND?!?!
almost got into it with the cashier. bitch dont look at me like that just cuz im only buying wine and icing. ill fight.
I remember having the weirdest thoughts and thinking our room was a compass and we were in the compass or something.
Making a mobile stripper pole for the back of my truck memorial weekend. Is where dignity goes to die
He can keep it, but if he asks for anything else i'm just going to start pissing on things.
We broke into her grandpa's pool at 2 am and I held my underwear out the window on the way home.
We got stuck in traffic in the tunnel while we were smoking weed. We were afraid to air out the car.
A 5 day bender that ended with refusing to pay my bar tab before I left the city. I offered to send them a selfie so they knew to never let me back in.
I made out with a girl because I wanted to get in the VIP section of the bar because they have these big comfy couches. It worked.
I mean. I'm excited for the Seahawks too. I just love nachos.
I took a picture of you last night while you were drunk, trying to smoke a bowl through your nose. It's now your contact id.
Who knew removing piercings would be so radical?
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