please pick me up with an explanation of why i shacked in a trailer with a guy who doesnt have a car.
Something in my vomit makes me think I shouldn't have had that slurpee
You'd think if the campus holds 28,000 undergrad I wouldn't run into three people I've hooked up with in one day
I sent him pictures of just me in my thong and he replied "you're so sweet, you make me feel special <3".... Oh.
So I think my aunt and her one legged boyfriend are getting it on in the next room. Traumatized does not even begin to describe what I am right now
Whatever. I just smoked another bowl so I don't care and wow I just noticed how fast my thumb moves when I text. I'm amazing.
I just wanted to let u know that I called the taco people and informed them what the fuck is up.
It's gay softball weekend. Lots of hot gay strangers to go home with.
Lol. I get my husbands paycheck every week. Immediate deposit into my purse next to his balls.
All I'm saying is that if he knows his wife walks around naked during the day, he shouldn't bring a friend home for lunch and show up unannounced.
He sent me a dick pic, and it had smeared lipstick on it. So I sent him the pic of my tit with the hickey ring your brother gave me.
It's gonna be like a sexual version of A Christmas Carol in my house in a few days.
I am rewearing my dress from last night. I only wore it for like two hours before fucking. And I took it off first so no cock contact. This is my new standard of cleanliness.
So was this before or after he cried about trump?
After
My Boss was giving porn recommendations. I think I'm scarred for life.
Randomize
