6:33 AM: I'm drunk at this time of morning.
so the car was packed with everything from my dorm, plus my mom. during the 6 hour trip home she found my kama sutra. started flippin through it.....
oh shit that had to have been awkward
i thought so too. until she asked what the check marks were for
There's nothing worse than waking up naked on the beach covered in sand and a family walking by.
He poured the shots. We did them together. I cheersd him out of the shower
Needless to say they were not happy to find out that we braided their hair together, when one of them woke up needing to puke bad
Trust me. My penis has made more than enough decisions this weekend.
Hangover or death. Death. I'll have a slice of death please.
Can't wait to bequeath this flannel to my grandchildren someday.
'I've been using this to pick up lesbians since before you were born!'
Would it be inappropriate to send a friend request to the sheriff that fingerprinted me last night???
Good news my life of crime finally paid off
I HAVENT HAD A NICE A NICE DICK SINCE FEBRUARY!! I WANNA KEEP THIS ONE!!!
I can't remember what I did last night, but judging from the state of my hair I had a pretty good time.
the next morning we realized we didnt speak the same language... guess i subconsciously did learn a little german last semester. thanks study abroad.
ah the experiences a semester in Vienna can give you. Frau would enjoy knowing that even while sleeping during class you still managed to learn enough german to get laid
Did I literally just offer a blowjob for help moving? Yes. Yes, I did.
Heels with jeans turned Casual Friday into Casual Sex With My Boss Friday
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