hey, what are you doing tonight?
sleeping, g'night!
but i wanted to see you :(
sleeping! g'night!(801): i miss you!
stop - you have a right hand - use it!
I woke up to a bunch of college seniors jacking off a horse in my face. Geuss who didnt move in time?
I can handle NPR. I speak hippie. I took it in college.
I made $300 today by selling pizza @ $4 a slice to nerds who refuse to leave the library. God I love finals time
gettin drunk isnt as much fun when i can use my own id for it
you grabbed his arm with one hand and the bottle of smirnoff with the other and headed off to your room you were on a mission
He wrote me poetry. 12 hours after getting my number
My love will cover her like lulu lemon yoga pants. Casually supportive and always complimenting your Ass.
So this is where people who peaked in high school come to drink?
Of all the things that can be stripped of me i'll be damned if it's my vanity
I'm not sure. But a mason jar of drug free urine just as soon as anyone can would be so awesome.
Holy shit, add "successfully got stoned secretly at a party where a cop was" to my list of accomplishments.
Would you laugh at me if I told you I think I burned my nipples?
She used a candle as a shot glass.. A FUCKING CANDLE BRO!!
Just found out a shooting happened in our parking lot while it was closed this morning. So thaaaaaaaaats fun.
Randomize
