a strip club that doesn't allow touching or asking for sex... whats the point?
unless her vagina can tell me my horoscope in sign language, I'm not going.
He just screamed at her, "if you pass out i am still having sex with you!!!" In front of the entire party.
it makes it look bigger when i shave, i hope its not the same for a girl
I fucked her while she was wearing her boyfriends dogtags. I'm officially a bad american
8$ liquor pitchers. I'm gonna wear two or three pairs of underwear so when drunk me takes them off there'll still be a pair on.
No... No really he actually thought the condom was meant for his hand...
He just laughed at his drink laid on the floor and crawled to the bathroom
And then I asked the bartender for my third shot and he told me he had to cut me off at two because this was in fact a family fun center
After my date left I rallied and took the Asian girl home. Flexibility my friend.
He was literally going down on me and giving me a foot rub AT THE SAME TIME. What more can I ask for?
He sent me a recycled dick pic! He could at least use one without sunlight in it, considering it's 10pm
It just makes me feel nauseous. And I don't want to feel nauseous when all I really want is to get off.
Dude my doctor just legit got down on her knees and loudly begged me to do my pap smear
Do you ever get a cramp in like, ONE labia?
Some mornings I close deals. Other mornings I puke out my window while I’m driving down the highway
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