Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
Her birthday cake consisted of a shot of tequila with a candle in it
He was on Keeping Up with the Kardashians it was like a deed from god to bang him
I ran a string through all of my old vicodin bottles and strung them on the tree. Tis the season.
they were fucking between cars in the parking lot and everyone was cheering at them.
You kept telling me how warm your bag of vomit was and asked me if i wanted to feel.
New drinking game. Every time Romney and Santorum switch leads, take a shot.
....this is what your political science major is getting you?
Bathtub guy came to. He helped me roll the fat chick away from the fridge. Shower and breakfast are on. You're plan failed!
You drink it until you puke in a vent one time and it's ruined forever.
If I ever see that bitch it is going down flavor of love style
Btw any and all sexual fantasies or arousal I had about cops is null and void.
I'm trying to be all porn star and he's making it all The Notebook
Fuck it, I work hard. I deserve nice sex toys
Woke up to find that I was cock blocked by no more than three people.
I have a cheeseburger in my purse and im going to fill her prescription for narcotics. Who thought i was responsible enough to sign her discharge papers?
Randomize