just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
scarred for life. way too high and witnessed some chick give a dude head on the dance floor
So I managed to get the bitch who has been copying off me all semester in History to copy the names of Pokemon towns off my test.
I found a fingernail in my vagina. A fingernail.
he knocked a glass of water onto my bed and then said that he should get to sleep on the dry side because he was "a guest"
I have to stop letting him stay all weekend. I feel like a cored apple.
Just heard a girl ask "Wait you're not my boyfriend?!" to a guy wearing the Mickey to her Minnie Mouse on my way home. Made me feel better about myself.
MY WHOLE FAMLY IS TALKING ABOUT MY BUTT
WAIT I'M COMING I WANT TO TALK ABOUT IT TOO
I hope none of us try to run for public office one day
Everybody posting sickening holiday couple pics and I'm over here deepthroating a bottle of whiskey.
And speaking of good acting I may have a sex tape now
It was somewhere in between an airport security patdown and a medical examination. No groping or squeezing, just brief pokes and pats.
It's not even 8pm on a Friday and I've already got a guy to tell me how big his penis is. Watched anything good on Netflix lately?
Like wanna sit on your face while you speak German hot
Remeber when we went camping and fucked those two guys? Yeah me either but I'm covered in poison oak so I'm guessing it's from that.
Randomize
