Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
do you ever just like the smell of your farts?
totally poinked my lawyers daughter in his hot tub last night. i figure getting off is just compensation for not getting me off.
we ran out of wine so you tried to make some by throwing grapes and nail polish remover in a blender.
just got a girls number while on a 5 am adderall cig break this is college at its finest
nyquil sex gave me 6 orgasms so I support that
he got a rim job in the basement.
apparently i was the one who gave it to him.
in fingerprint form on my ass. Seriously not cool. \ni bruiiiseeee like a delicate fruiiiitttt. Heeeaaarrr the rythymmm
Wait, is this the kid that tried catching a bat in your backyard with a flashlight and a ball of tin foil?
I think that's the key to being an adult though... Get those rapid fire beer shits out I the way early, then you can go about your grown man business
I'm about to fuck a girl in an old school Tony Kukoc Bulls jersey. About to earn my third championship ring in sex
Right when he asked me if I was on birth control my dad walked in. This is my fate.
moral of my life: don't tell a guy you want to have sex with him. he'll get back together with his ex.
Just got home, my brothers stoned and he got a high score on COD.. He just asked me if I wanted to have a celebrational yogurt with him. Wtf?
Don't mind me, I'm just walking 2 miles across campus with no jacket, covered in highlighter, and carrying a hair extension. Gotta love miami!
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