i overslept, had to take a cab to the train station, might puke, bought the wrong flavored vitamin water, and mj's dead. what a terrible world to wake up to.
you may be an alcoholic when your drug dealer calls to yell at you for drinking too
took acid and went on safebus. all the lights were off except the adds. swear to god it was a submarine
so whenever I text yeah my phone automatically corrects it to yeahhhheeehhyeahyeahh .. too much party in the USA?
If im paying 4grand for laser eye surgery, it better help with beer goggles cuz last night was pretty rough.
I think I'm coming down now. I almost started crying because I lost a piece of paper.
No. I heard a cover of "my heart will go on". This is not sanity.
Rush week is fine, only the t-shirts are white and if it rains, the frat boys in their lawn chairs will be treated to 800 freshmen girls in their first wet tshirt contest.
Welcome to college.
i projectile vomited shoeless at 7:30 a.m. in a taco bell parking lot. never again.
If we all have the time, and the weather permits, and you have no plans, we should have another go at Operation Get Our Carless Friends Laid. All the lonely people will be out. We can take our lonely people out too.
And then god smiled down upon me and he said let there be hangover food and let it be Wendy's
We are the rockettes of vaginal bleeding
where are my pants?
in the oven.
Okay first of all fuck you and everything you stand for because Taco Bell is amazing.
No I'm not high but I did cry for over an hour tonight because I realized that they never made a sequel to "Under the Tuscan Sun" with Diane Lane.
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