i've got a dick and you've got a pussy....what is the problem??
First thing she said after sex was.. are you baptised by chance?
yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
too bad they don't have a 'people you may be able to do' thing on facebook. it would save me a lot of fucking time.
Do NOT cum in me, on me, or in my bed.
I think when she wakes up, she'll either kill me, or laugh. I hope she laughs.
Just found a hole in my wall with your left shoe in it.
He got me an interview at his law firm and his boss asked him what he had to say about me. His response "He dates CRAZY bitches."
Either this is the best sandwich I've ever had, or my stomach is just relieved to have something in it that's not Red Bull or semen.
dude, you cant keep using "she roofied me" as an excuse to bang all these fat chicks
Seriously my only wish tonight is to be at the club in a sombrero w my shirt off pouring tequila on bitches titties
You were passed out in the OutBack Bowl Shrimp costume and when we asked you wtf happened you just said On Wisconsin.
It was a blind-side dick pic.
I'm glad you had fun with your genitals.
A+ Viking dick
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