okay im going to go eat, shower and find underwear... call if you want.... but ill be listenig to glee VERY loudly.
wicked high...have munchies. cherry flavor lube. problem solved.
I'm beginning to feel kind of at home at Police stations
I just had someone I don't even know on Facebook message me saying it seems like I drink too much and should slow down.
and he's drinking a bud lime in his profile pic meaning i can out drink him, meaning i would clearly be the alpha in our relationship
Okay so for future reference and your own safety I should probably tell you that it is not cranberry juice in that bottle on the kitchen table.
I'm thinking blowjobs and wheelchair sex should be part of any post-injury wellness plan.
He either works for the Irish Mob or I'm being Catfished
I'm using my ex bfs phone number to look up his Kroger card so I can get a discount on condoms...yep this is my life
I feel like she is getting all kinds of bacterial exposure that may otherwise have been avoided had she been wearing pants
All I have in my new place is coke and a treadmill.. it's workout Wednesday
the amount I squirted last night was insane. Im glad i ignored tlc's advice, i went chasing waterfalls and loved every god damn minute of it.
Just caught myself checking an online porn site while in a strip club. Might have a problem.
Someone stole a lamp last night.
I wasn't even hungover I was just mourning my dignity
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