@ a funeral. fucking miss uuuu
I had a dream once that juice was flowing out of my kitchen faucet
I don't think the people up for their 8am class were as impressed with how many beads i got last night as we were.
Nothing like studying in the College of Communication to make you realize how smart you are.
she might purposely get aids just to give it to you. I think she might hate you that much.
putting weed in the twinkies box was possibly the best idea you've ever had
The silhouette of his dick looked like an eagle. Amurrican.
I don't understand why she gets annoyed by my drunk texts. It means she's who I'm thinking about even when my brain isn't functioning properly.
Is it festive if I masturbate to Santa porn?
I just had a sexting conversation using medieval jargon. I think he is a fine suitor.
I got to walk around for eight hours wearing power armor and acting camp. No way I wouldn't love it.
Thanks for ruining my life with your man penis
If we're going to communicate going forward, you'll need to be versed in Gillian Anderson.
My goal tonight is to be arrested by the Police Women of Cincinnati.
He was eating me out on a samsung washing machine and as soon as I came, I heard the "end of cycle" song. That tune will now always remind me of the screaming, multiple orgasms I recieved tonight!
Randomize
