Nob stitches i do do not bleed anymorr!
would it be inappropriate to describe you with the phrase "bigass titties"?
i just discovered how you can fold down the cardboard sleeve on a hot pocket. Life just got a whole lot easier.
Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
If your dick isn't up when i get home you're catching tonight.
What can I say, we hook up during the holidays.. We're a seasonal couple
you handed me the dorito you were about to eat and told me to 'keep him safe' while you went to the bathroom
I just pull a splinter from the head of my penis. It was a rough night.
I went to pick my brother up downtown and I stopped at a red light a homeless old man comes up knocks on the window shows me his penis and then screams money
Go forth my friend, but don't do any of that fruitful and multiplying shit.
I tipped him really well because I feel he knew we were high, but did it in a non judgemental way.
My ex-wife, who I haven't heard from since the divorce, just Amazoned me cherry flavored massage oil and a rainbow caps with the message "Happy Pride". What's the polite response?
The cat just brought me a bottle opener. I think she's my soulmate.
I'd ask how but then you'd tell me.
One can only be this extremely wet once a year and I feel like I'm bitch slapping god by not using this gift he has bestowed on me.
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
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