: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
so... i had sex tonight
with a midget
nicccce tits for a little person
just when i thought things couldnt get worse, the batteries died in my vibrator.
Then all the boys were saying that they were amazed at how much i could smoke...i'm so proud of myself
i'm pretty sure god just pointed at me and laughed
Even Lady Gaga hates Purdue
I forgot how few teeth there are in this state...
We're too lazy too send a pic of out balls. Just assume this is a pic of our balls and respond accordingly.
he convinced me that i wont have to do the walk of shame bc he has to go to jail in the morning
his dad came out and found me sleeping indian style on the couch with my cup balancing on my boobs. didn't spill a drop.
Everything smells like vodka and bologna. WHAT DID YOU DO?
Last night you said you were going to stop drinking and then proceeded to dip cookies in your vodka.
Sadly that explains a lot.
Great. I will show up in your office wearing only oven mitts later today.
Fyi, shaking your genitals at me doesn't count as "trying to have sex".
its official, you're fucking me on my lunch break. the only thing I want in my mouth is your dick. pick me up at noon.
want fries with that?
Randomize
