Do you remember last night at all? Be honest
I need to look at the pictures on my camera to fill in the gaps.
I woke up to find her cooking breakfast wearing nothing but my Nuggets jersey. I don't think this could end better.
She recited Pi throughout ever orgasm she had....she said it was a game she likes to play...how far she gets is how she judges her lovers...I am oddly turned on by this...
She checked into foursquare right as she left work so he would think she was there late and not on some other guy's dick
I have to say for barely passing high school, that girl is a genius.
You were spooning my trash can and I had to crumble cookies on the floor by your face to get you to eat
well as your friend its only fair to offer my cock for your services. Cause I care.
She was literally passed out in a cubicle with a flask in her hand. I LOVE finals week!
The last thing I remember was doing a line in the shape of Texas
Dude, we apparently put a washing machine drum in that back of your truck with the full intention of making a bonfire in it.
I went in to wake you up this morning and you had a condom draped across your throat like a necklace. There were no boys in the house last night, what were you doing?
I'm just gonna stay I'm bed where it is warm and cozy and nobody knows me as the girl that puked on a stripper
Girl in my public speaking class just gave a speech on weaves, God I love community college
what's your room number? I've never been there sober...
I need dunkaroos back in my life.
I told my mom Jesus would want me to snort drugs on his birthday
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