So it's like pop-o-matic trouble, but with penises
You know, I really only think drinking is a problem if you're not good at it.
The only problem is i have violated all potential new years resolutions at the new years party.
when i asked what day 420 fell on this year, she answered so quickly i knew i found my soulmate.
No, he grudge fucked my ex so I wouldn't be tempted to get back with her. He is either the worst or best friend ever.
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
found a cell phone. in the freezer. wrapped in bologna. explain?
Apparently I got mad at you for "Not drinking with me till we thought we were seahorses" and smashed my face on your door. Then I put my feet in the oven and started crying because I was drinking alcohol from a pot. My life is spinning out of control.
I'm just going to lay in a blanket cocoon of self pity for the next few months.
Nah I think he's a bit weirded out I worked out where he lives from a Facebook photo
So high I legit spent 20mins in the shower just holding my tits cuz they feel bigger than normal.
Thanks again for the coffee and orgasms
sorry i got drunk at sunday brunch and force fed carrot sticks to your cat
Crawl out into the sunshine and off your vibrator for 7 minutes
What happened last night? I just woke up and there's like 15 mcflurry cups on the floor
You don't remember stealing them?
Randomize
