We got bored. So we went to planned parenthood to stare at everyone who made worse decisions than us last night.
He ripped my extensions out during sex, not noticing until this morning when he saw them on the floor. I told him they werent mine and he went and threw them in his sister's room.
Please talk me out of ordering the stripper pole for a dollar. Please.
I started drinking at around 8.. Started heavily drinking around 815.
Strip beer pong in the front yard? Of course the cops showed up
I don't know which is worse, the fact that he can say will you fuck me in so many languages or that I'm turned on because of that
Want a slice of this weekend's hottest piece of ass?
You don't have to have sex with both if us but I would like a little positive fucking regard.
THE AUSTRALIAN IS SINGLE AS FUCK.
Idk how much of a virgin he is but I'm tryna find out.
She flashed us last time and pissed all over the floor this time. I'm scared to invite her back.
I woke up with clothes on this morning and I'm pretty sure you had something to do with that. Thank you.
I think you know you’ve caught feelings when you’re asking a tinder boy his opinion about your current fuck buddy.
dude, he literally lasted one minute. and i paid 8 dollars for cabs.
I got here. Mom yelled "drink of the day is blueberry sangria" and next thing I knew I was on a slip and slide.
Randomize
