No one goes out in public like that, unless they do anal
fyi, if youre wondering if offering a female police officer sexual favors will get you out of a ticket, the answer is no.
Shaking her cervix like it's the hottest ticket around
If letting him bang me while i'm wearing reindeer antlers and a painted red nose isn't the christmas spirit, I dont know what is
I had something called a trashcan. Never again. I almost fucked chewbacca.
Lost my credit card. M has a bottle of blood in her pocket from a hobo.
We had to leave after he was in the middle of the street yelling "Balls of Steeeeeeeeel!!"
That one dude should feel honored if he were to get herpes from you. Fuck that Guy. He is a herpe.
sending him nudies in gran's hospital bathroom. you?
Hooked up with a guy resembling a bearded Cher. I need the lenses on my beer goggles fixed. Pronto.
Spent the majority of my senior year drunk. Graduate of 2011, I think 2011. Probably.
I don't have time to shower before my passport photos...your cum is all over my hair...that's with me for 10 years now
My body looks like ricotta cheese had a vacation
Her blowjob technique? Picture someone attempting to drink a triple thick milkshake through a Capri Sun straw.
I drank Dr. Pepper and instant breakfast mix together and threw up sober for the first time.
Randomize
