3:26am: come over
you purposely dodge me and you could have stopped me from leaving, you know how far i live. YOU come over
4:11am: mnlodp
dude I don't understand hebrew and I'm not coming over
He said he used to draw on the walls with poop when he was a kid.
I just found pizaa roll in my hair. Already been to class today
Because selling drugs to kids never goes out of business. We get older, they stay the same stupid.
That chick who made out with a door is here. Want her number??
am i gonna have visuals on this?
you are gonna see the trees puking up fireworks and ninja pheonixes will shit rainbows and fire
he went at my nipples like a starved dog.
My dad just sent me a text reminding me to bring the family beer pong championship belt. Thanksgiving 2012 just got real
WHO JUST REMOVED THAT SAME BOARD IN TWO MINUTES FLAT WITH NO INJURIES, SHOES, SOCKS, OR BRA?! THIS BITCH. CRACKIN A BEER FOR DA SHOWA. BITCHES AIN'T SHIT MOTHAFUCKA
My fuck buddy is great and all, but it gets weird when she gets in arguments with her BF in the driveway
I inhaled my own vomit, how was your night?
We are so drunk half our team had to bowl with a chaperone. We won every game. We drink
I call him Seabiscuit because he's my trusty steed
don't worry, i'm not mad. i'm just angry. and furious. and about to set your ass on fire.
I thought it turned out lovely. You got to see me almost naked and I got to be stoned to the point I was content with
Wtf when were you almost naked??
Randomize
