I do regret it. But I can't unfuck her
Is it a problem that I find my wife's 16 year old niece sexy?
I did something last night that I shouldn't have, but I don't want to tell you because you'll probably just make it your fb status...
I see you've learned your lesson.
dude there's no way we're going back in there for your puke shoes
there is literally a full grown man stuck between the radiator and her bed. i thought i kicked him out 20 minutes ago but nope we found him
He just stared me dead in the eye as he continued to beat off. Then said "you were going to catch me sooner or later".
I just want you to know that I think it is hilarious and wonderful that 40s are now your alcohol of choice.
I have a fever. Last thing I need to do tonight is be elbow deep in old lady pussy.
She made this little rubber cap thing that looks like a brain to go on my dick. She calls it a "penis cap". Industrial design students are weird...
Just got road head. In broad daylight. On the interstate. During rush hour. Pushing the envelope one public bj at a time.
I've spent my afternoon dipping strawberries in DayQuil if that's any indication of where I'm at in life.
I wrote a list of things I enjoy doing. So far it says "get high and go to museums."
What do you mean not that crazy? I had sex last night. with my\nBOSS. in the restaurant where we WORK.... ON A DINNER TABLE.
If you needed to get laid tonight all you had to do was ask
she hand cuffed me to the bed naked, jumped off the dresser naked, hit her head on the fan and knocked herself out. when her mom came home i had to call her for help, she could have died man...
Randomize
