some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
I took an adderall but just ended up meticulously arranging my farmville for hours
awesome recipe for disaster- bar hopping at the airport
I just cleaned your Jaeger vomit off my car with a knife. Don't ever say I don't love you.
I have hooked up with someone in EVERYONE OF MY CLASSES.
That's how you know you deserve to be a senior
oh my god. separately texting an Allie and an Ally while drunk is hard, and I'm climbed 1/2 way up a bridge pier.
Also. I plan to spend time with you at boomers, high, teaching ourselves how to pee standing up.
The best part about being single is knowing how much everyone secretly creeps behind their gf/bfs back. You wouldn't believe..Have a great date night!
I've never seen a dude bust out of his jacket and rock an air banjo like u
You made me drive your car so you could give the dude from the parking lot a BJ in the back seat. Classy.
tried to suck my ex boyfriends dick last night at a bar... Happy homecoming from me to you
He literally just made me hold his dick while he peed cause he wanted to know if I could aim as good as him
Look I'm really high right now, and if I were to leave this house, it would be for the sole purpose of getting an ice cream sandwich. So can you please just do it.
His dog was laying on the bed and he said we could have sex as long as we didn't disturb his dog. My life is pathetic
Where are you? Where am I? Why am I so red?
Randomize