I just figured it out. Meghan has the same smile as Sylvester Stallone.
ha so i just found a picture of you eating paper towels and many of Laura freaking out from it.
i keep forgetting that not all of my female friends are bisexual.
As soon as the judge read that I rear ended the car from getting roadhead he chuckled. You know he's been there before.
Our house almost burnt down last night. I woke up at 4:10am to the smoke alarm going off bc the bean bag chair was on fire so i extinguished it and smoked a bowl at 4:20 to celebrate my fire extinguishing abilities
Worst walk of shame everrr. Hopefully the thought of me walking 20 minutes in the freezing cold with someone else's sweatpants, a bra on & high heels will cheer you up today.
Oh god there are people jogging. Fuck off productive people, you don't know me.
Teeth make me feel like a dinosaur. Can you feel yours?
i passed out twice in the shower, twice on the bathroom floor, once holding the toilet bowl and 8 times moving from the bathroom to my bed. Tequila sucks.
They put me in room 420 every time and I take bubble baths and smoke in the room and they bring food TO MY BED
I am having telepathic thoughts with my cat. He loves me and wants me to blow his nose
You are the ghost of drunk bitches past, present, and future.
Guy pissing in the corner in downtown Boston as his girlfriend is covering him up, yelling "relationship goals"
I think my pickup truck has been used for the sex... This doesn't sit right with me.
You whispered 'For Frodo', handed me your shirt, and charged campus security.
Your amazing boobs made me fall in love with boobs. I never cared about boobs you should be proud
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