TYLER... glimpse of last night: leather chaps, guacamole dip, a jump rope, spray paint, and rhinestone studded pajamas.
i think you have the wrong number... but your story sounds delightful.
i just ate something from under my fingernail. i dont know what it was, but it tasted half decent
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
you took him to the bathroom with you to pee and told him he had to hold your hand..but he couldn't turn on the lights because you didnt want him to hear you peeing..and still got laid. i wish i had your life.
He was sweet. He even warned me that his dick curved, and I quote, "more than a banana."
I just remembered I gave $20 to a bum last nite. Philanthropy events always make me do stupid shit.
You know it was a good weekend when; you leave a bi-lingual letter of apology on top of a stack of cash for hotel housekeeping.
I GOT A VENDING MACHINE FOR OUR LIVING ROOM
I want to lick his teeth again. Is that a creepy thing to say?
i had a mental breakdown over a math asignment proposed to a glass of chocolate milk then burned my hands when i acidentally leaned on the stove i have the grill marks burned on my hands i can see them
its only been 20 minuts since i last saw you
I'm so glad you support me having casual sex with your uncle
SpongeBob is life. I once broke up with a guy bc he said SpongeBob was stupid.
It's not even a normal fucking affair I've found myself in. It's a fucking bdsm clusterfuck.
I told my mom that I was just gonna go check the mail. It's been 19 hours, and I woke up in a hot tub covered in chocolate, with a text from her sayin "have fun sweetie"
Angels sing when his face is between my thighs. I came 3 times before he even came up for air.
Randomize
