fun fact: cucumber in vinegar with pepper = best ever high snack
He is such a slut. More and more my type.
I'm in a subway station watching a tranny do her makeup. This is like watching a unicorn giving birth.
have you facebook stalked him yet?
No, I don’t know his last name...
Just google his license plate numb
maybe i get so drunk and make stupid mistakes cuz Subconsiously im preparing for my real world debut
You tried feeding my python vodka through a funnel. Fuck off.
I sent him a pic of my tits and he said "Word." I need a drink.
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
I'd say tonight was pretty successful. I rode an iron horse naked and sweet talked myself out of an MIC while wearing a bra filled with four loko.
I just quoted part of the Pokemon theme song in a sext... And it worked
this potential sugar daddy just sent me a photo of him butt naked in the woods saying he wants to "grow our spirits together." so i think i found us a new drug dealer!
I tried to face swap with Chuck Norris. His face was too powerful... it broke my snap chat.
My mom found my empty case that I hid in my room and just said "now why don't you be a responsible underaged drinker and throw it in the recycling" and walked away. I'm in shock.
QUIT STEALING MY PHONE AND SEXTING MY MOM!!!!
I just don't understand what you plan on accomplishing there except for losing all vestiges of post-freshman year dignity
Randomize