you're the one who masterbates every night to the titanic soundtrack
I just went to a subway where the girl didn't know how to make a blt. I will not miss public school texans.
Wait, we're on the hunt for addys and explosives. They're both in this house somewhere.
I was told to ask you about memoirs of a geisha.
I have a strict rule of what enters my vajay. It's either sparkly, or human. Anything else and I draw the line. Standards.
do you think this outfit says "I maintained my dignity this weekend"?
Would it be inappropriate to trade Christmas cookies for sex?
YES. YOU ARE GOING TO HAVE SEX WITH ME WHILE I SING LES MIS.
actually there are like 49038098 people in the bathroom for no reason. Singing My Heart Will Go On and pseudo fighting.
Oh I see how it is...you can snap chat the world your balls but I wear dinosaur feetie pajamas and I'm the "weird one"
Congratulations, you have turned my vagina into a garden hose.
Ah, but I don't wear underwear. Every day is Commando Wednesday.
Who knew that showing someone your boobs would make them stop crying.
is it fun? or sober?
It's starting to get sad how I have this 'new beginning' feeling after every negative pregnancy test
Randomize
