weak ass sauce last night. waste of time. you suck. ps. your boobs are fake
Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
I'm watching a Sinbad stand up special. Not even drugs can make this funny.
Ok, honestly? Periods can't be THAT bad, have you ever tried to shave a ball sack?!
I'm sneaking you alcohol into a hospital. This either says love or "we have a problem"
Kid sitting next to me smells like he slept in a dutch oven full of farts. Going to die.
woke up to see a man wearing a sailor hat and covered in vomit sneaking out the door. Epic night indeed.
I'm sorry but I have WAY too many sex/ hookup related bruises on visible areas to be going home tmrw
pretend your vagina is a choco taco and the guy is someone who really loves choco tacos. let him enjoy the choco taco.
Idk man, she was drunker than me and i was sitting there talking to a raccoon about it's broken leg.
Mom just referred to a 9 year old as "this bitch", so I'd say day drinking was a success.
Not only did my parents pick me up from his hotel room in the morning, but he also came outside and had a casual little chat with my dad through the driver's side windrow.
How did you tell her we met?
I told her that we met at the sex shop down the street, I thought it would be the most reasonable explanation.
Once someone takes a shit in your toilet they are no longer a guest.
Randomize
