this girl is running around outside screaming, it's creaming on me! it's creaming on me. I totally have to find my video camera
sitting with a guy who's looking at the cum stains on the bed. Do you think he's convinced it's from the cat?
No. He thinks you're slutty.
office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
Just threw up in the waiting room. I can't believe I have to switch dermatologists again.
You told my mom you were going to "Raw Dawg some randoms." That Drunk.
So I walk in and he's teaching someone in London via Skype how to roll a blunt. I have new found respect for him.
soo...what's the appropriate way to ask to come over and take your S&M lingerie out of your ex's apartment? big weekend planned, kinda need it.
I vaguely remember seeing that couple making out in front of that store and i yelled "I ALSO LOVE THE ROCKY MOUNTAIN SOAP COMPANY!"
I woke up to pizza pinned to my wall. So that's that.
Why is there cereal literally EVERYWHERE?
It didn't follow directions.
This is why people in Buffalo die of heart attacks. This and wings
I can’t believe I made out with a flat earther and didn’t know about it until now!
I don't want to sleep with any other woman but you but I want to try this whole mother daughter thing that would be nuts
How naked do you want me to be?
the raccoons are back...
Randomize
