I just jerked it to the same porn two nights in a row... and she says I have problems with commitment...
Of course she's mad at you. You Kanye Wested a picture of her catching snowflakes in her mouth. "imma let you finish but..." was the shaft and you put two of Kanye West's heads for the balls.
i dont even know how to be here
so are you any less fat since you started doing blow?
Do you ever wonder how many people have prayed for you to be a better person?
I found him CRAWLING across the garden. He saw me,smiled,and asked for a napkin.
Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!
This guy is walking around with a deer head on. Honestly what the fuck
I just had a great idea for an etsy shop. Sell all the shit bitches leave from one nighters
There's tequila in my general area. Please pray for me.
You okay? Last night you climbed through my window and demanded I take shots with you and when I refused you took a piss in my front yard.
that's your fault. you refused to take shots with me.
He told me was "pretty like the wife in some movie where the husband is a cheater." I think I'm gonna fuck him.
I slapped a guy during sex last night because he moaned the wrong name. Then I remembered I gave him a fake name. Sorry bro.
we tried to make a drinking game out of 4 pokemon cards you found in a drawer.
kick those bitches in the teeth and tell them mama came to party
Randomize
