Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
how many days can you live off of Vicodin and frosty?? im going on 4 days......
Just found a dugout in my rental car glove box. Suddenly my mood is upbeat.
the realtor just asked me if i've ever made meth on this property.... i need to do something about my hair
Vegas should really enforce the buddy system because if not everyone is going to end up swimming during the water show in front of the Bellagio.
I knew it was on when he was dancing on stage and I gave him a dollar so in return he ripped my tit out of my shirt and started sucking on it IN THE MIDDLE OF THE BAR.
I just made a drug deal 100% through snap chat
So I just sneezed blood everywhere. On the upside. After yesterday I feel way more confident AND I give even less of a fuck.
I think the best part was the fact that the stripper's lock screen was a picture of the virgin mary
... and smoked a joint with my new landlord. I'm starting to like Germany.
Dead. I am actually dead. Also, worst nightmare confirmed: throwing up in a four hundred person lecture.
Apparently I'm some kind of sexual camel.
We played 2 very competitive games of Jenga and then fucked our brains out... BEST. RELATIONSHIP. EVER.
This is like the fourth time this month I've woken up hungover in someone's backyard
Today is a good day to get high. It's easy to blame the glazed-over look in my eye on my new contacts
Randomize
