I got everything I ever gave her back, every picture, and money for the dog. I didn't want it she brought it all back and gave it to me. clothes jackets, pictures, dried flowers, ear rings, necklace...
Sell it on ebay and let's go to the bar
So tell me more about the cum that came out of your nose
i think the sales of Rosetta Stone are directly related to the size of that woman's tit's
you were holding her hair as she threw up saying "I'm going to be a great doctor" repeatedly.
We had sex in the woods. It was great until some bird started mimicking my orgasm sounds
Making a drinking game out of jeopardy does not mean you studied..
Just signed my boyfriend up on a dating website so I could officially have a reason to leave him for my hot neighbor.
So ive narrowed my options down to getting food or masturbating. Don't judge me
My Instagram consists mostly of drag queens and people who dress up as power rangers... I'm pretty sure I'm an unclassified category of gay
Just keep in mind that she didn't start telling you you had the largest penis she had ever seen until AFTER she found out about your multi-million-dollar trust fund.
I told people at my moms bar that all I needed to sober up was to get my asshole licked, and I blame you 110%.
You would critique a dick pic. Damn art people.
i woke up between my boyfriend and his sister and i don't know if we fucked or cried together
A cop may or may not have seen my bare ass against the moonlight within the past hour
There's a big ass bed, hella ecstasy, and I can guarantee you'll regret every second that you remember.
Randomize