I cant talk right now they are about to fuck again
oh my god. i just found my camera... on top of the bush outside of my house. never let me drink everclear again
There is a bruise on my cock the size of a golfball. Bad sign.
The hospital said it would be 'irresponsible' for them to allow people to book stomach pumps.
Just to give you a heads up, I am going home with your ex-boyfriend.... You can't be mad because he was my ex-boyfriend first
I'm venturing to your corner of this sin house in t minus 2 minutes.
Her family was right next to mine during christmas eve mass. Between the terrifying glares and her trying to set my sleeve on fire during the candle part I am VERY sure she knows im fucking her ex...
Let's fuck under the stars. And by under the stars I mean in my bed underneath my glow in the dark star stickers.
Smoked a blunt with my dad then introduced him to cinnabon delights. Today was a good day.
Come share oat with me in your robe
I ended up in th ER yelling my height weight and age
She told me having sex was our civic duty. How can I not love her?
WHAT A DUMBASS ugh I'm so glad he looks like a middle aged dad now
Did that sound smart? Cuz beneath the boozy exterior beats the heart of a fucking scientist.
She really wants to hug you. With her vagina.
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