At a sweet 16. cant remember what shirt im wearing byt dnt worry im not sleeping w/ the guy who serves the chicken nuggets again
dont worry, it'll just be a conversation starter like "why did you get that pierced?" or "wow, i got arrested there too"
It's now 3:30 and the guy I went home with is showering me with shredded cheese. Nbd.
Just wanna let u know that we are almost on the pity blow job level of our friendship.
I still can't believe he came down from his hiding place in the tree voluntarily because he didn't want us to have to talk to the cops alone...
My vagina was just really confused why you weren't inside it
No like he has curves. I remember thinking he had a nicer body than me
Don't be the guy that has his dick out at work.
Fucking adderall I just talked at the security guard for 90 minutes
i dunno, a lot of my childhood feels like a drugged up fever dream
So I fucked a guy with his mouth wired shut last night never thought id cross that off my imaginary bucket list
Recliner chair sex has moments of worry....just don't.
at this point, i'm only going to therapy to get more free condoms
It was rocky mountain showdown of course we got shitfaced and talked about eating buffaloes
I had to break up with her. She was sending me study schedules and recipes for vegan lasagna. I’m just trying to survive man
Randomize
