i felt like we were having sex on ultimate fighter, and people on the outside kept yelling ELBOW ELBOW! KNEES KNEES!
Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher
I don't know what I could have possibly done in a past life to deserve watching my boyfriend projectile vomit margaritas and probs blood while completely naked.
Definitely got drunk and sent her a literal picture of my asshole. I titled it " you"
Doing tuck and rolls down a stair case was not my brightest idea
Of course, you get to fuck all night while I'm stuck in the girls bathroom sucking a limp dick for coke
there was a trail of blood coming out of one of the bathroom stalls. thought of you
I have a feeling she doesn't appreciate me as a person. She only fucks me because I look like Harry Potter.
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
At my eighteen year old cousin's wedding. Getting hit on by a 9 year old. No one knows who he came with. I'm pretty sure he just showed up from the field behind the church. Help.
Update: day 5 and Scott has not left the apartment. Still smoking. Pizza roll supply dwindling.
I need to thank someone for this kid's penis.
I figured it out! There's blood on the kitchen floor because I fell into the dishwasher. And there's a face dent. And it doesn't work.
Yea.....I saw that happen.
Thrres cinnamon everywgte. Plead cine get me
we cut you off when you started chasing with your slim fast shake
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